Heather Cook

Distraught man talking to someone across a wooden table.

Why They Say “You Know What You Did”: The Unexpected Backlash

A very common situation for Autistics is one where someone is upset at us and we can’t figure out what we did or said to upset them. I’d like to offer my explanation for why this happens.

Person with their head in their hands, staring at the computer in front of them.

The Critical Secret To Getting Out Of Autistic Burnout

Struggling with autistic burnout? Learn why dissolving internalized ableism is the most critical factor for recovery.

Hands holding up a paper chain of people, with one of them cast in shadow.

Why Finding Your Autistic Community Didn’t Fix Your Loneliness (The Truth No One Talks About)

When we finally figure out that we’re Autistic, we think finding community in other Autistics will be what allows us to finally find good relationships. But sometimes, it just results in us feeling more isolated than ever.

Reflections on My Van Mini-Series

I’m reflecting on what it has been like to take a camera along on my trip and record my thoughts and experiences along the way.

A woman holding her hands in front of her, surrounded by a green foreground. Text next to her reads: "People Pleasing Plus Demand Avoidance".

The Uncomfortable Combination Of People Pleasing And Demand Avoidance

In my last video, I shared the story of being unfairly accused of cheating someone, but forgot to finish with what happened with the sheriff. Here’s the rest of that story.

A woman looking off to the side, surrounded by a green foreground. Text next to her reads: "My Self-care Attempt Came Crashing Down".

Self-Care Backfired – And Nearly Derailed All My Autistic Unmasking Progress

I got up early to avoid a potential issue with where I was staying overnight, which reminded me of another time I had a similar issue, over a misunderstanding at a campground in Arkansas.

I panicked when I saw the price

When I went in to the Denver Museum of Nature and Science, I saw the general admission price and freaked out and panicked. Here’s how I worked through whether or not to pay to go in.

Halfway done is wholly right

I’m revisiting the Denver Museum of Nature and Science, where I had a major mental shift six years ago, that helped me let go of the need to complete everything.

A woman with her hands up in the air, surrounded by a green foreground. Text next to her reads: "Not Taking Advice That Doesn't Apply To You".

Trust Your Path: When to Ignore Good Advice

I’m laying out a framework for how to tell whether the advice someone is giving you, or that you find on the Internet, is relevant for you or not.

The Abuse of High Standards

I’m reflecting on how easy it is for high moral standards, high standards of justice, high standards of behavior, or high standards of achievement can be damaging.