Self-Reg
Why Trying Harder Backfires
After trying a range of activities to see how each made your body feel, did you notice anything unexpected? Did some that you associate with relaxing not actually have that relaxing effect? Here’s why.
Here are the books I recommend most (yes, I’ve read every one of them) for those living and parenting on the autism spectrum. However, they’re not all directly about autism. Life isn’t that neatly compartmentalized.
Disclosure: links to Amazon.com and Bookshop.org are affiliate links, which means I get a small commission from purchases at no cost to you.
- F: Fiction
- NF: Non-Fiction
- AiA: Author is Autistic
- HTP: Heather's Top Picks
Neurodiversity-Positive Picture Books
| Title | About | Buy | ||
|---|---|---|---|---|
  | A Friend for Henry | Henry is a little different than the other kids in his class, but he wants a friend, too. | F HTP | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Penguin and Pinecone | Penguin has an idea of who Pinecone should be, but when he finds out that isn't who Pinecone is, he helps his friend thrive as himself. | F HTP | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Weslandia | Wesley turns his inventive way of looking at the world to a unique summer project. | F HTP | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Sophie's Squash Go to School | Sophie gets along better with her two squash friends than with her classmates. | F | Amazon Bookshop |
  | I Go Quiet | Gorgeous illustrations. For those of us who go quiet sometimes. | F | Amazon Bookshop |
  | I'm Sad | One of the best explanations I've ever seen about feeling sad. | F | Amazon Bookshop |
  | The Rabbit Listened | Sometimes the best thing a friend can do to fix an upset is...just to listen. | F | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Love, Sophia on the Moon | Sophia learns that even though sometimes mom yells, and even though there is bedtime, and time outs, mom still loves her very much. | F | Amazon Bookshop |
  | The Girl Who Never Made Mistakes | Perfectionism can be a tough act to live up to. | F | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Too Sticky! | Holly loves doing experiments, but when she finds out the next one is making slime, she's worried. Holly doesn't like touching sticky things. | F AiA | Amazon Bookshop |
  | The Girl Who Thought in Pictures: The Story of Dr. Temple Grandin | A biography of Temple Grandin. | NF | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Can I Play Too? | Two boys' fun train-track-building project takes a turn when one of the boys obliviously insists on only doing things his way. | F AiA | Amazon Bookshop |
  | On Wings of Words: The Extraordinary Life of Emily Dickinson | In a small New England town lives Emily Dickinson, a girl in love with small things--a flower petal, a bird, a ray of light, a word. (Current thinking is that Emily was likely autistic.) Gorgeous illustrations. | F | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Stick and Stone | When Stick rescues Stone from a prickly situation with a Pinecone, the pair becomes fast friends. But when Stick gets stuck, can Stone return the favor? | F HTP | Amazon Bookshop |
  | A Place for Zero | Zero is lonely in Digitaria. He can't play Addemup with the other numbers because he has nothing to add, but when zero discovers multiplication he thinks he might have a place there. | F | Amazon Bookshop |
- F: Fiction
- NF: Non-Fiction
- AiA: Author is Autistic
- HTP: Heather's Top Picks
Autism-Positive Middle Grade Books
| Title | About | Buy | ||
|---|---|---|---|---|
  | We Could Be Heroes | Hank is autistic and hasn't had a real friend before, until Maisie attaches herself to him, opening his world. | F HTP | Amazon Bookshop |
  | See You in the Cosmos | Alex follows his own sense of right and wrong in pursuing his love of space and figuring out his family. | F HTP | Amazon Bookshop |
  | In Two Worlds | A non-speaking autistic boy feels like his life is passing him by...until one day everything changes. | F AiA | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Real | Charity, a non-speaking autistic girl, struggles to control her body and show the world what she can do and who she is. | F AiA | Amazon Bookshop |
  | I am Aspiengirl | A showcase of the unique characteristics, traits and gifts of girls on the Autism Spectrum. | NF | Amazon Bookshop |
  | The Asperkid's Secret Book of Social Rules | A top secret guide to all of the hidden social rules in life that often seem strange and confusing to young people with Asperger syndrome. | NF AiA | Amazon Bookshop |
  | A Boy Called Bat (Bk. 1) | Bixby Alexander Tam (nicknamed Bat), loves animals. His mom, a veterinarian, has brought home a baby skunk, which she needs to take care of until she can hand him over to a wild-animal shelter. But the minute Bat meets the kit, he knows they belong together. And he's got one month to show his mom that a baby skunk might just make a pretty terrific pet. | F | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Bat and the Waiting Game (Bk. 2) | When Bat's older sister, Janie, gets a part in the school play and can’t watch Bat after school, it means some pretty big changes, and Bat just wants everything to go back to normal. | F | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Bat and the End of Everything (Bk. 3) | Bat) has been the caretaker for Thor, the best skunk kit in the world...but Thor is almost ready to be released into the wild. Not only that, but his best friend is leaving for a long vacation in Canada. Bat can’t help but feel that everything is coming to an end. | F | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Anything But Typical | Jason Blake is an autistic twelve-year-old who finds a glimmer of understanding when he comes across PhoenixBird, who posts stories to the same online site as he does. But as desperate as he is to meet her, he's terrified that if they do meet, Rebecca will only see his autism and not who Jason really is. | F | Amazon Bookshop |
  | The Someday Birds | When his father heads from California to Virginia for medical treatment, Charlie, an autistic boy who feels he doesn't understand the world, reluctantly travels cross-country with his boy-crazy sister, unruly brothers, and a mysterious new family friend. He decides that if he can spot all the birds that he and his father were hoping to see someday along the way, then everything might just turn out okay. | F AiA | Amazon Bookshop |
  | The Awesome Autistic Go-To Guide: A Practical Handbook for Autistic Teens and Tweens | Full of insights about being awesome and autistic, this book celebrates the strengths of understanding the world in a different way. It looks at all the reasons being you and thinking differently can be totally awesome! It also has tips for managing tricky situations such as meltdowns, sensory differences and anxiety. This book helps you develop the confidence to be who you are. | NF AiA | Amazon Bookshop |
  | The Teen Guide to Sensory Issues | In this guide, written especially for teens and those who love them, Rachel S. Schneider, MA, MHC, breaks the challenges of sensory teenagehood into hilarious, thoughtful, and manageable chunks. Through personal stories as well as tips and tricks to survive and thrive during these years, Rachel reminds us that we're not alone. | NF AiA | Amazon Bookshop |
  | A Kind of Spark | An autistic girl who fixates on how her town treated "witches" in the past, simply because these women were different, and fights to make it right. | F AiA | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Planet Earth Is Blue | Nova is a non-speaking autistic girl who loves space and her sister, but they've lived in foster homes for years and were just split up. Will they find each other in time for the launch of the space shuttle Challenger? | F | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Emma-Jean Lazarus Fell Out of a Tree | Emma-Jean Lazarus is the smartest and strangest girl at her school. Her classmates don't understand her, but that's okay because Emma-Jean doesn't quite get them either. But one afternoon, all that changes when she sees Colleen Pomerantz crying in the girl's room. | F | Amazon |
  | Can You See Me? | Tally isn't ashamed of being autistic, or her PDA, but something is different about sixth grade, and Tally now feels like she has to act normal. But as Tally hides her true self, she starts to wonder what normal means after all and whether fitting in is really what matters most. | F AiA | Amazon Bookshop |
  | We Are All Made of Molecules | Stewart, 13: Socially clueless genius. Ashley, 14: Popular with everyone but her teachers. Ashley's and Stewart's worlds collide when Stewart and his dad move in with Ashley and her mom. | F | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Willodeen | Eleven-year-old Willodeen adores the strange beasts known as "screechers" that her village sees as pests. Her fierce determination to stand up for them may solve another mystery as well. | F | Amazon Bookshop |
- F: Fiction
- NF: Non-Fiction
- AiA: Author is Autistic
- HTP: Heather's Top Picks
Autism-Positive Young Adult Books
| Title | About | Buy | ||
|---|---|---|---|---|
  | Underdogs | One million cloned soldiers. A nation imprisoned. Only a group of neurodiverse rebels, most of whom are teenagers, are fighting back. After a lifetime of being defined by their weaknesses, they must learn how to play to their strengths. | F AiA | Amazon |
  | Geek Girl | Harriet is a geeky girl who accidentally steals her best friend's dream to be a famous model, leading to many funny situations. | F AiA | Amazon Bookshop |
  | The Many Half-Lived Lives of Sam Sylvester | A nonbinary autistic teen realizes they must not only solve a 30-year-old mystery but also face the demons lurking in their past in order to live a satisfying life. | F HTP | Amazon Bookshop |
| The Asperkid's Secret Book of Social Rules | A top secret guide to all of the hidden social rules in life that often seem strange and confusing to young people with Asperger syndrome. | NF AiA | Amazon Bookshop |
  | I am AspienWoman | A showcase of the unique characteristics, traits and gifts of teens and women on the Autism Spectrum. | NF AiA | Amazon Bookshop |
| The Awesome Autistic Go-To Guide: A Practical Handbook for Autistic Teens and Tweens | Full of insights about being awesome and autistic, this book celebrates the strengths of understanding the world in a different way. It looks at all the reasons being you and thinking differently can be totally awesome! It also has tips for managing tricky situations such as meltdowns, sensory differences and anxiety. This book helps you develop the confidence to be who you are. | NF AiA | Amazon Bookshop |
| The Teen Guide to Sensory Issues | In this guide, written especially for teens and those who love them, Rachel S. Schneider, MA, MHC, breaks the challenges of sensory teenagehood into hilarious, thoughtful, and manageable chunks. Through personal stories as well as tips and tricks to survive and thrive during these years, Rachel reminds us that we're not alone. | NF AiA | Amazon Bookshop |
- F: Fiction
- NF: Non-Fiction
- AiA: Author is Autistic
- HTP: Heather's Top Picks
Neurodiversity-Positive MG and YA Books
| Title | About | Diversity Representation (Trigger Warnings) | Buy | |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Underdogs | One million cloned soldiers. A nation imprisoned. Only a group of neurodiverse rebels, most of whom are teenagers, are fighting back. After a lifetime of being defined by their weaknesses, the teens must learn how to play to their strengths, and become the best they can be in a world that has never been on their side. | Autism PDA ADHD Down Syndrome Selective Mutism Neurodiversity (Violence) | Amazon |
  | The Scent Keeper | Emmeline lives on a remote island with her father, who teaches her about the natural world through her senses, until one day Emmeline is vaulted out into the real world. To understand her past, Emmeline must unlock the clues to her identity, a quest that challenges the limits of her heart and imagination. | Sensory Diversity (Bereavement) | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Ender's Game | To defend against a hostile alien race, governments train child geniuses as soldiers. Ender's skills make him a leader in school, yet he suffers from isolation, rivalry from his peers, pressure from the adult teachers, and fear of the alien invaders. Can he be the general Earth needs? | Giftedness | Amazon Bookshop |
  | The Brave | A boy's speech compulsions make him an outcast and target for bullying, until he finds people who see it completely differently, who see him differently. | OCD BIPOC (Terminal Illness) | Amazon Bookshop |
  | The Giver | In a world where sameness is idealized and differences minimized, a boy is singled out for a unique role in his community. | Sensory Diversity Neurodiversity | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Every Last Word | Samantha McAllister is one of the popular girls. But hidden beneath her perfect makeup is a secret that her friends would never understand: Sam is consumed by a stream of dark thoughts and worries that she can't turn off. When Caroline introduces Sam to Poet's Corner, everything changes, but will it be for the better? | Purely-Obsessional OCD (Suicide) | Amazon Bookshop |
  | How to Disappear Completely | Beautifully written, a wonderful story of coping with changes you don't want, learning to be your best self, and seeing the best in others. | Vitiligo Physical Differences | Amazon Bookshop |
  | List of Ten | Troy Hayes is fed up with humiliation, loneliness, and physical pain, and creates a list of ten things to do by the tenth anniversary of his Tourettes diagnosis—culminating in suicide. But working his way through the list changes Troy. | Tourettes OCD (Suicide) | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Forget Me Not | Astronomy-loving Calliope June sometimes makes faces or noises that she doesn't mean to make. Only Calliope's new neighbor, who is also the popular student body president, sees her as she truly is--an interesting person and a good friend. But is he brave enough to take their friendship public? | Tourettes | Amazon Bookshop |
  | A Taxonomy of Love | The moment Spencer meets Hope the summer before seventh grade, it's . . . something at first sight. Through sibling feuds and family tragedies, new relationships and broken hearts, the two grow together and apart, and Spencer tries to map it all out. | Tourettes (Bereavement) | Amazon Bookshop |
  | The Easy Part of Impossible | Ria Williams was an elite diver on track for the Olympics until a freak accident at a meet changes everything. Can she figure out what she really wants when the thing she loves is so tangled up in the thing she fears the most? | ADHD Autism (Emotional Abuse) | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Fish in a Tree | Ally hides her inability to read, which sometimes creates difficult, awkward, and frustrating situations. Then everything changes when she gets a new teacher and opens up to two potential friends. She learns not to be so hard on herself and that dyslexia is nothing to be ashamed of. | Dyslexia Autism | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Holding up the Universe | Jack Masselin cannot recognize faces, not even his family's, and Libby Strout's size makes it impossible for her to hide. The two hurt and help each other as they challenge the assumptions people make about who they really are. | Prosopagnosia Physical Differences (Fat Shaming) | Amazon Bookshop |
  | The Miscalculations of Lightning Girl | Lucy Callahan's life was changed forever when she was struck by lightning. She doesn't remember it, but the zap gave her genius-level math skills, and she's been homeschooled ever since. Now, at 12 years old, she's technically ready for college. She just has to pass 1 more test--middle school. | Giftedness | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe | Aristotle is an angry teen with a brother in prison. Dante is a know-it-all who has an unusual way of looking at the world. When the two meet at the swimming pool, they seem to have nothing in common. But as the loners start spending time together, they discover that they share a special friendship. | Neurodiversity Homosexuality BIPOC | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Insignificant Events in the Life of a Cactus | Aven is a spunky girl born without arms. Her new life takes an unexpected turn when she bonds with Connor, a classmate who also feels isolated because of his own disability, and they discover a room at Stagecoach Pass that holds bigger secrets than Aven ever could have imagined. | Physical Differences Tourettes BIPOC | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Momentous Events in the Life of a Cactus | Aven's about to begin high school . . . with 3,000 new kids to stare at her. And no matter how much Aven tries to play it cool, nothing prepares her for the reality. | Physical Differences Tourettes BIPOC | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Counting by 7s | Willow Chance is a twelve-year-old genius with OCD tendencies whose life gets turned upside down when a car crash kills her parents. | Giftedness OCD BIPOC | Amazon Bookshop |
  | The Lightning Thief | Percy Jackson is about to be kicked out of boarding school . . . and mythological monsters and the gods of Mount Olympus seem to be walking straight out of the pages of Percy's Greek mythology textbook and into his life. | ADHD | Amazon Bookshop |
- F: Fiction
- NF: Non-Fiction
- AiA: Author is Autistic
- HTP: Heather's Top Picks
Diversity-Positive YA and Adult Sci-Fi and Fantasy Books
| Title | About | Diversity Representation (Trigger Warnings) | Buy | |
|---|---|---|---|---|
  | Raybearer | Tarisai was raised in isolation by a mysterious, often absent mother known only as The Lady. The Lady sends her to compete to be one of the Crown Prince's Council. If chosen, she'll be joined with them in a bond deeper than blood. But The Lady made a magical wish that compels Tarisai to kill the Crown Prince once she gains his trust. Book 1 of 2. | Ability differences BIPOC Neurodiversity | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Ancillary Justice | The soldier known as Breq was once a colossal starship with an artificial intelligence linking thousands of soldiers. Now, an act of treachery has ripped it all away, leaving her with one fragile human body, unanswered questions, and a burning desire for vengeance. Book 1 of 3. | Ability differences BIPOC Neurodiversity | Amazon Bookshop |
  | The Fifth Season | At the end of the world, a woman must hide her secret power and find her kidnapped daughter in this intricate and extraordinary Hugo Award winning novel of power, oppression, and revolution. Book 1 of 3. | Ability differences BIPOC Neurodiversity | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Shadow and Bone | Orphaned and expendable, Alina Starkov is a soldier. When her regiment is attacked, Alina unleashes dormant magic not even she knew she possessed. Alina enters a lavish world of royalty and intrigue as she trains with the Grisha, her country's magical military elite--and falls under the spell of their notorious leader, the Darkling--trying to master her untamed gift. Book 1 of 3. | Ability differences Neurodiversity | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Six of Crows | Criminal prodigy Kaz Brekker is offered a chance at a deadly heist that could make him rich beyond his wildest dreams. But he can't pull it off alone. Book 1 of 2. | Ability differences Neurodiversity | Amazon Bookshop |
| Underdogs | One million cloned soldiers. A nation imprisoned. Only a group of neurodiverse rebels, most of whom are teenagers, are fighting back. After a lifetime of being defined by their weaknesses, the teens must learn how to play to their strengths, and become the best they can be in a world that has never been on their side. | Autism PDA ADHD Down Syndrome Selective Mutism Neurodiversity (Violence) | Amazon |
| Ender's Game | To defend against a hostile alien race, governments train child geniuses as soldiers. Ender's skills make him a leader in school, yet he suffers from isolation, rivalry from his peers, pressure from the adult teachers, and fear of the alien invaders. Can he be the general Earth needs? | Giftedness | Amazon Bookshop |
| The Giver | In a world where sameness is idealized and differences minimized, a boy is singled out for a unique role in his community. | Sensory Diversity Neurodiversity | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Light From Uncommon Stars | Shizuka Satomi, violin teacher, made a deal with the devil. When Katrina Nguyen, a young transgender runaway, catches Shizuka's ear with her wild talent, Shizuka can almost feel the curse lifting. But then Shizuka meets Lan Tran, interstellar refugee, whose eyes like stars might just redefine a soul's worth. | LGBTQ+ Neurodiversity (Transphobia, Abuse) | Amazon Bookshop |
| The Lightning Thief | Percy Jackson is about to be kicked out of boarding school . . . and mythological monsters and the gods of Mount Olympus seem to be walking straight out of the pages of Percy's Greek mythology textbook and into his life. | ADHD | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Granted | In a magical land called the Haven lives a young fairy named Ophelia Delphinium Fidgets. She is a Granter: one of the select fairies whose job it is to venture out into the world and grant the wishes of humans. Today, Ophelia is going to get her very first wish-granting assignment. But figuring out how to truly give someone what they want takes much more than a handful of fairy dust. | Neurodiversity Ability differences | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Unseen Academicals | The wizards of Unseen University must win a football match, without using magic. The Big Match draws in a street urchin, a maker of jolly good pies, a dim but beautiful young woman, and the mysterious Mr Nutt (no one knows anything much about Mr Nutt, not even Mr Nutt, which worries him, too). As the match approaches, the four lives are entangled and changed forever. | Racial diversity Neurodiversity | Amazon Bookshop |
- F: Fiction
- NF: Non-Fiction
- AiA: Author is Autistic
- HTP: Heather's Top Picks
Autistic Autobiographies
| Title | About | Buy | ||
|---|---|---|---|---|
  | The Electricity of Every Living Thing: A Woman’s Walk in the Wild to Find Her Way Home | As Katherine May walks the 630-mile South West Coast Path, she comes to terms with her autism diagnosis leading her to re-evaluate her life so far -- with a much kinder, more forgiving eye. | NF AiA | Amazon Bookshop |
  | The Reason I Jump: The Inner Voice of a Thirteen-Year-Old Boy with Autism | Naoki Higashida is a very smart, very self-aware, and very charming thirteen-year-old boy with severe autism. He describes how an autistic mind thinks, feels, perceives, and responds in ways few can imagine. | NF AiA HTP | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Autism in Heels: The Untold Story of a Female Life on the Spectrum | At the age of thirty-five, Jennifer was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome, and for the first time in her life, things made sense. Now, Jennifer exposes the constant struggle between carefully crafted persona and authentic existence with wit, candor, passion, and power. | NF AiA | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Songs of the Gorilla Nation: My Journey Through Autism | Having suffered from a lifelong inability to relate to people in a meaningful way, Dawn was surprised to find herself irresistibly drawn to these great primates. By observing and working with them, she was finally able to connect to living beings in a way she had never previously experienced. | NF AiA | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Ido in Autismland: Climbing Out of Autism's Silent Prison | Ido opens a window into non-verbal autism through dozens of short, autobiographical essays each offering new insights into autism symptoms, effective and ineffective treatments and the inner emotional life of a severely autistic boy. | NF AiA HTP | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Explaining Humans: What Science Can Teach Us About Life, Love and Relationships | Diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder at the age of eight, Dr Camilla Pang struggled to understand the world around her. Desperate for a solution, Camilla asked her mother if there was an instruction manual for humans that she could consult. But, without the blueprint to life she was hoping for, Camilla began to create her own. | NF AiA HTP | Amazon |
  | I Am Intelligent: From Heartbreak to Healing--A Mother and Daughter's Journey Through Autism | A gripping look into the lives of a mother obsessed with curing her child of autism and a daughter who retains full awareness of her situation. | NF AiA | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Nobody Nowhere: The Remarkable Autobiography of an Autistic Girl | Donna Williams was a child with more labels than a jam-jar: deaf, wild disturbed, stupid insane... After twenty-five years of being misunderstood, and unable to understand herself, Donna stumbled upon the word 'autism': a label which made sense of her life and struggles, and gave her a chance to finally forgive both herself and those around her. | NF AiA | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Born on a Blue Day: Inside the Extraordinary Mind of an Autistic Savant | Daniel Tammet sees numbers as shapes, colors, and textures, and can perform extraordinary calculations in his head, learn to speak new languages fluently in a week, and recited more than 22,000 digits of pi, setting a record. He has savant syndrome, and describes what is happening in his head. | NF AiA | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Look Me in the Eye: My Life with Asperger's | Ever since he was young, John Robison longed to connect with other people, but by the time he was a teenager, his odd habits had earned him the label "social deviant." It was not until he was forty that he was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome. That understanding transformed the way he saw himself--and the world. | NF AiA HTP | Amazon Bookshop |
- F: Fiction
- NF: Non-Fiction
- AiA: Author is Autistic
- HTP: Heather's Top Picks
Parenting Resources
| Title | About | Buy | ||
|---|---|---|---|---|
  | Self-Reg: How to Help Your Child (and You) Break the Stress Cycle and Successfully Engage with Life | Dr. Shanker translates decades of his findings from working with children into practical, prescriptive advice for parents, giving them concrete ways to develop their self-regulation skills and teach their children to do the same and engage successfully with life for optimal learning, social, and emotional growth. | NF HTP | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism | Dr. Barry M. Prizant suggests the most successful approaches to autism don’t aim at fixing a person by eliminating symptoms, but rather seeking to understand the individual’s experience and what underlies the behavior. | NF | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Punished by Rewards: The Trouble with Gold Stars, Incentive Plans, A'S, Praise, and Other Bribes | Drawing from hundreds of studies, Kohn demonstrates that we actually do inferior work when we are enticed with money, grades, or other incentives—and are apt to lose interest in whatever we were bribed to do. | NF HTP | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Coloring Outside Autism's Lines: 50+ Activities, Adventures, and Celebrations for Families with Children with Autism | It can seem as though there are so many things you just can't do. But there are adventures--large and small--that kids with autism love, and they are waiting for your whole family! | NF | Amazon |
  | Beyond Behaviors: Using Brain Science and Compassion to Understand and Solve Children's Behavioral Challenges | Dr. Mona Delahooke describes behaviors as the tip of the iceberg, important signals that we should address by seeking to understand a child’s individual differences in the context of relational safety. Features worksheets, tools and techniques to reduce behavioral challenges and promote psychological resilience and satisfying, secure relationships. | NF HTP | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Balanced and Barefoot: How Unrestricted Outdoor Play Makes for Strong, Confident, and Capable Children | In this important book, a pediatric occupational therapist and founder of TimberNook shows how outdoor play and unstructured freedom of movement are vital for children's cognitive development and growth, and offers tons of fun, engaging ways to help ensure that kids grow into healthy, balanced, and resilient adults. | NF | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Make It Stick: The Science of Successful Learning | Many common study habits and practice routines turn out to be counterproductive. Drawing on recent discoveries in cognitive psychology and other disciplines, the authors offer concrete techniques for becoming more productive learners. | NF | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Scattered: How ADD Originates and What You Can Do about It | Dr. Gabor Maté believes that our social and emotional environments play a key role in both the cause of and cure for Attention Deficit Disorder. | NF | Amazon Bookshop |
  | The Asperkid's Game Plan: Extraordinary Minds, Purposeful Play... Ordinary Stuff | The Asperkid's Game Plan looks from the inside at the learning style of children with Asperger syndrome and explains how to introduce structured play that engages Asperkids and explicitly addresses ASD weaknesses while reinforcing ASD strengths. | NF AiA | Amazon Bookshop |
  | What Your Child on the Spectrum Really Needs: Advice From 12 Autistic Adults | This book is different from other autism parenting guides in that the advice mentioned has been generated solely from the autistic individuals themselves, divulging what has helped or hurt them as they navigated childhood and adulthood as autistic individuals. | NF AiA | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Asperkids: An Insider's Guide to Loving, Understanding and Teaching Children with Asperger Syndrome | As a parent, a teacher and an Aspie herself, Jennifer Cook O'Toole provides a unique insider's look into Asperger Syndrome. She shows how to help children on the spectrum by understanding how they think and exploiting their special interests to promote learning. Her strategies work because she thinks like the children that she teaches. | NF AiA HTP | Amazon Bookshop |
  | The Yes Brain: How to Cultivate Courage, Curiosity, and Resilience in Your Child | When facing contentious issues such as screen time, food choices, and bedtime, children often act out or shut down, responding with reactivity instead of receptivity. Siegel calls this a No Brain response. But our kids can learn to approach life with openness and curiosity, a Yes Brain. This book gives parents skills, scripts, and activities to bring kids of all ages into a “yes” state. | NF HTP | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Making Sense: A Guide to Sensory Issues | In this guide, mental health counselor, SPD community advocate, and sensory adult Rachel S. Schneider MA MHC helps us to make sense of sensory issues. and answers your questions about life with sensory processing differences. | NF | Amazon Bookshop |
  | The Learning Tree: Overcoming Learning Disabilities from the Ground Up | The Learning Tree offers a new understanding of learning problems. Rather than looking just at symptoms, this new approach describes how to find the missing developmental steps that cause these symptoms. The best solution to the problem comes from knowing what essential skills to strengthen. | NF | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Sincerely, Your Autistic Child: What People on the Autism Spectrum Wish Their Parents Knew about Growing Up, Acceptance, and Identity | A diverse collection of autistic contributors reflect on what they have learned while growing up on the autism spectrum and how parents can avoid common mistakes and overcome challenges while raising their child. | NF AiA HTP | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Transgender Teen: A Handbook for Parents and Professionals Supporting Transgender and Non-Binary Teens | Is it just a phase, a fad, or a real issue with your teen? This comprehensive guidebook explores the unique challenges that thousands of families face every day raising a teenager who may be transgender, gender-variant or gender-fluid. | NF | Amazon Bookshop |
- F: Fiction
- NF: Non-Fiction
- AiA: Author is Autistic
- HTP: Heather's Top Picks
Adult Nonfiction to Become Your Best You
While not all of these relate specifically to autism or neurodiversity, they are great reads for anyone curious about the world and themselves.
| Title | About | Buy | ||
|---|---|---|---|---|
  | The Way of Integrity: Finding the Path to Your True Self | In The Way of Integrity, Martha Beck presents a four-stage process that anyone can use to find integrity, and with it, a sense of purpose, emotional healing, and a life free of mental suffering. Much of what plagues us—people pleasing, staying in stale relationships, negative habits—all point to what happens when we are out of touch with what truly makes us feel whole. | NF HTP | Amazon Bookshop |
| Explaining Humans: What Science Can Teach Us About Life, Love and Relationships | Diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder at the age of eight, Dr Camilla Pang struggled to understand the world around her. Desperate for a solution, Camilla asked her mother if there was an instruction manual for humans that she could consult. But, without the blueprint to life she was hoping for, Camilla began to create her own. | NF AiA HTP | Amazon |
  | Loving What Is: Four Questions That Can Change Your Life | Discover the truth hiding behind troubling thoughts with Byron Katie's self-help classic. The Work is simply four questions that, when applied to a specific problem, enable you to see what is troubling you in an entirely different light. | NF HTP | Amazon Bookshop |
| Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism | Dr. Barry M. Prizant suggests the most successful approaches to autism don’t aim at fixing a person by eliminating symptoms, but rather seeking to understand the individual’s experience and what underlies the behavior. | NF | Amazon Bookshop |
  | The Pattern Seekers: How Autism Drives Human Invention | A groundbreaking argument about the link between autism and human ingenuity throughout history. | NF | Amazon Bookshop |
| Beyond Behaviors: Using Brain Science and Compassion to Understand and Solve Children's Behavioral Challenges | Dr. Mona Delahooke describes behaviors as the tip of the iceberg, important signals that we should address by seeking to understand a child’s individual differences in the context of relational safety. Features worksheets, tools and techniques to reduce behavioral challenges and promote psychological resilience and satisfying, secure relationships. | NF HTP | Amazon Bookshop |
  | The Geography of Bliss: One Grump's Search for the Happiest Places in the World | Part travel memoir, part humor, and part twisted self-help guide, The Geography of Bliss takes the reader across the globe to investigate not what happiness is, but WHERE it is. | NF | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Dollars and Sense: How We Misthink Money and How to Spend Smarter | Behavioral economist Dan Ariely teams up with financial comedian and writer Jeff Kreisler to reveal the rationale and emotions behind our most head-scratching financial choices and offer clear guidance for navigating the treacherous financial landscape of the brain. | NF | Amazon Bookshop |
  | The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma | Dr. Bessel van der Kolk, show show how trauma literally reshapes both body and brain, compromising sufferers’ capacities for pleasure, engagement, self-control, and trust. He explores innovative paths to recovery by activating the brain’s natural neuroplasticity. | NF | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Move Your DNA: Restore Your Health Through Natural Movement, 2nd Edition | Katy Bowman has shaken up the health and wellness world, spreading the message that this culture’s sedentarism has become pervasive, and exercise is no longer a viable solution: movement is. | NF HTP | Amazon Bookshop |
  | The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom | Don Miguel Ruiz reveals the source of self-limiting beliefs that rob us of joy and create needless suffering. Based on ancient Toltec wisdom, The Four Agreements offer a powerful code of conduct that can rapidly transform our lives to a new experience of freedom, true happiness, and love. | NF | Amazon Bookshop |
  | The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You're Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are | A motivational and inspiring guide to wholehearted living, ok, with this groundbreaking work Brené Brown, Ph.D., explores the psychology of releasing our definitions of an "imperfect" life and embracing living authentically. | NF | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Braiding Sweetgrass: Indigenous Wisdom, Scientific Knowledge and the Teachings of Plants | Drawing on her life as an indigenous scientist, and as a woman, Kimmerer shows how other living beings--asters and goldenrod, strawberries and squash, salamanders, algae, and sweetgrass--offer us gifts and lessons, even if we've forgotten how to hear their voices. | NF | Amazon Bookshop |
  | The Confidence Code: The Science and Art of Self-Assurance: What Women Should Know | Journalists Katty Kay and Claire Shipman travel to the frontiers of neuroscience, visit the world's leading psychologists, and interview women leaders from the worlds of politics, sports, the military, and the arts to learn the secrets of confidence. | NF | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Too Loud, Too Bright, Too Fast, Too Tight: What to Do If You Are Sensory Defensive in an Overstimulating World | With empathy, compassion, and practical tools, a developmental psychologist and sufferer of Sensory Defensive Disorder sheds light on a little known but common affliction in which sufferers react to harmless stimuli as irritating, distracting, or dangerous. | NF HTP | Amazon Bookshop |
  | The Highly Sensitive Person: How to Thrive When the World Overwhelms You | Most of us feel overstimulated every once in a while, but for the highly sensitive person, it's a way of life. In this groundbreaking book, Dr. Elaine Aron, a highly sensitive person herself, shows you how to identify this trait in yourself and make the most of it in everyday situations. | NF | Amazon Bookshop |
  | The End of Average: Unlocking Our Potential by Embracing What Makes Us Different | While we know people learn and develop in distinctive ways, these unique patterns of behaviors are lost in our schools and businesses which have been designed around the mythical “average person.” This model ignores our differences and fails at recognizing talent. It’s time to change it. | NF | Amazon Bookshop |
| Make It Stick: The Science of Successful Learning | Many common study habits and practice routines turn out to be counterproductive. Underlining and highlighting, rereading, cramming, and single-minded repetition of new skills create the illusion of mastery, but gains fade quickly. Drawing on recent discoveries in cognitive psychology and other disciplines, the authors offer concrete techniques for becoming more productive learners. | NF | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Slow: Simple Living for a Frantic World | After being diagnosed with post-natal depression, Brooke McAlary put the brakes on her stressful path and reorganized her life to emphasize depth, connection, and meaningful experiences. Brooke shares her story alongside practical advice for simplifying in ways that work for your life. | NF | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Sleep Smarter: 21 Essential Strategies to Sleep Your Way to A Better Body, Better Health, and Bigger Success | Learn how to create the ideal sleep sanctuary, how to hack sunlight to regulate your circadian rhythms, which clinically proven sleep nutrients and supplements you need, and stress-reduction exercises and fitness tips to keep you mentally and physically sharp. | NF | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Asperger's on the Job | There is more to a job than what the tasks are: from social blunders, to sensory issues, to bullying by coworkers, Simone presents solutions to difficult challenges based on her personal experiences and those of over fifty other adults with Asperger's. | NF AiA | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Activate Your Vagus Nerve: Unleash Your Body's Natural Ability to Heal | This helpful guide provides all the tools you need to understand and heal your vagus nerve, the rest, digest and recovery system. You’ll learn simple yet powerful techniques to address a variety of ailments health challenges, like inflammation, gut sensitivity and brain fog, from their root causes originating with the vagus nerve. | NF | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Finding Your Own North Star | Martha Beck shares her step-by-step program that will guide you to fulfill your own potential. | NF | Amazon Bookshop |
  | Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear | Elizabeth Gilbert digs deep into her own generative process to share her wisdom and unique perspective about creativity, and encourages us to uncover the "strange jewels" that are hidden within each of us. | NF | Amazon Bookshop |
  | The Four Day Win: End Your Diet War and Achieve Thinner Peace | Not a conventional diet or exercise program, Martha Beck combines evolutionary logic, psychology, neuroplasticity, and humor, to teach the principles required to reverse weight issues. | NF | Amazon Bookshop |
