Heather Cook

Distraught man talking to someone across a wooden table.

Why They Say “You Know What You Did”: The Unexpected Backlash

A very common situation for Autistics is one where someone is upset at us and we can’t figure out what we did or said to upset them. I’d like to offer my explanation for why this happens.

Person with their head in their hands, staring at the computer in front of them.

The Critical Secret To Getting Out Of Autistic Burnout

Struggling with autistic burnout? Learn why dissolving internalized ableism is the most critical factor for recovery.

Hands holding up a paper chain of people, with one of them cast in shadow.

Why Finding Your Autistic Community Didn’t Fix Your Loneliness (The Truth No One Talks About)

When we finally figure out that we’re Autistic, we think finding community in other Autistics will be what allows us to finally find good relationships. But sometimes, it just results in us feeling more isolated than ever.

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Making Things Better Is Too Big A Goal

Aiming to make things better can be overwhelming and frustrating. It can feel like the only options are trying to do everything or giving up and doing nothing. But there’s another option.

A page full of hexagons, with the words "Guilt-Free Progress Tracker."

Guilt-Free Progress Tracker for AuDHDers

I used to use habit trackers and star charts extensively, but if I ever missed a day it would cause me to completely break the entire habit, so I made a new solution.

An older woman and a younger one hugging.

Is It Anxiety or a Bad Situation?

When being faced with genuinely awful situations, it can be hard to tell if what you’re struggling with is anxiety or just your reaction to the terrible situation itself.

Two people smiling and side-hugging on a beach.

Autistic Pride Day

It’s Autistic Pride Day and I’ve been thinking lately about what pride means in this context, and what I’m proud of.

Woman with her hand on her head staring at a computer.

Breaking Free From Anxiety’s Biggest Lies

Anxiety can be insidious. Here are some of its biggest lies, and why it’s lying to you, and what you can do to break free.

A couple of items sitting next to a computer on a desk.

When WFH Backfired, and Increased My Anxiety

This is a story that took place a few years before I figured out I’m Autistic. My supposed dream come true of working from home turned out to be a recipe for high anxiety.

Person underneath a blanket staring at a bright phone in a dark room.

6 Things that Increase Anxiety for Autistics

Here are 6 common things that tend to increase anxiety for Autistics, and the biggest reason why they they have that effect: it may not be what you think. Because they’re not bad things.